Friday, September 2, 2011

So I decided a while back to kinda plan my funeral. Not actually go to a funeral home, pick out a casket and get a headstone but rather do some planning for things I really feel are important for me to have done, read or sang when I die. Somehow its comforting to know I have these few key elements taken care of. Below is a poem I sent out. One of my best friends Shannon has offered herself up to read it at a podium, in the church at my funeral. I think this will set the tone for how I'm hoping people will handle my death moving forward. No I'm not planning ON KICKING THE BUCKET ANYTIME SOON lol but those who know me well know I'm a planner. It makes me feel at ease when I have a plan. Some may think its strange or morbid but if you look at it from my point of view I will kinda know what my funeral will be like even thought I'm technically not there to see it and that is comforting to me. Death inst the end, its just the beginning of a new life in a different dimension.

To my dearest family, some things I'd like to say...
but first of all, to let you know, that I arrived okay.
I'm writing this from heaven. Here I dwell with God above.
Here, there's no more tears of sadness; here is just eternal love.

Please do not be unhappy just because I'm out of sight.

Remember that I'm with you every morning, noon and night.
That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through,
God picked me up and hugged me and He said, "I welcome you."

It's good to have you back again; you were missed while you were gone.

As for your dearest family, they'll be here later on.
I need you here badly; you're part of my plan.
There's so much that we have to do, to help our mortal man.

God gave me a list of things, that he wished for me to do.

And foremost on the list, was to watch and care for you.
And when you lie in bed at night, the day's chores put to flight.
God and I are closest to the middle of the night.

When you think of my life on earth, and all those loving years

because you are only human, they are bound to bring you tears.
But do not be afraid to cry; it does relieve the pain.
Remember there would be no flowers, unless there was some rain.

I wish that I could tell you all that God has planned.

But if I were to tell you, you wouldn't understand.
But one thing is for certain, though my life on earth is o'er.
I'm closer to you now, than I ever was before.

There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb;

but together we can do it by taking one day at a time.
It was always my philosophy and I'd like it for you too...
that as you give unto the world, the world will give to you.

If you can help somebody who's in sorrow and pain,

then you can say to God at night......"My day was not in vain."
And now I am contented....that my life has been worthwhile,
knowing as I passed along the way, I made somebody smile.

So if you meet somebody who is sad and feeling low,

just lend a hand to pick him up, as on your way you go.
When you're walking down the street, and you've got me on your mind;
I'm walking in your footsteps only half a step behind.

And when it's time for you to go.... from that body to be free,

remember you're not're coming here to me.

Ruth Ann Mahaffey (author)

©Copyright 1998

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Divorce...The kids come first

I said it once and Ill say it again; DIVORCE SUCKS! Whether you're getting a divorce, been through divorce, a friend of someone getting divorced or have divorced parents its the same; its sad, hard, confusing and emotionally taxing.
  Lets go back to 1982. I was 2 and my parents decided to divorce. I have no recollection of this. I have one memory of my "birth parents" and I together and we were feeding ducks and eating ice cream (go figure I remember the ice cream lol) I cant tell you if the divorce affected me because again I don't really remember my parents as a married couple. To this day I look at them and just don't get how they were ever a couple. They are so different; maybe that's why they aren't married now. I lucked out. I got amazing "bonus" parents and I call them "mom" and "dad." To me they are my parents. I have 4 parents, 2 moms and 2 dads. Thats been my life since I was about 3 or 4. I'm used to it cause I don't know differently. #1 rule in my book...Let your child decide if they like your ex's new partner. It would have been very easy for either my mom or father to get upset about the other moving on...maybe they were but again I never knew if that was the case because they let me decide how I felt about the new person. Of course theres exceptions. No one should introduce their child to a new partner in the first few months or introduce the child to every person they date; but when they find that person whos very special to them, who they have grown to really know and trust its up to you as an ex to let your child decide if they like them (again as long as the new mate isn't detrimental to the child, evil or a killer of course lol) My parents didn't really fight. As far as I know. If they did it wasn't in front of me. I NEVER have heard my Father speak bad about my mom or dad (I call my bonus dad "dad" and my birth father "father" its how we keep it all straight around here lol of course when Im with my Father I call him dad. Confused yet?) Ive also never heard my mom speak ill of my father. They were always nice and civil, they put me first and made the transition very smooth and easy on me and Ill assume that's why I adjusted so easily and I'm not "damaged" by it as an adult. I don't have a jaded perception of marriage. I know not all men cheat or treat women badly. I grew up in a home where my mom and dad (bonus dad) loved one another. They argued because when you're married you're bound to get into it but they also always made up. I learned how to communicate with my now husband by watching them lead by example. I learned even when you have kids you and your spouse need to still make time for each other. Don't get so wrapped up in your kids you forget why they are there to begin with. You as a husband and wife set the foundation for which your children learn.
  I have found my parents divorce is not the "norm." Most people who divorce aren't so civil and nice. They forget that there's a child involved and that needs to be the priority not your own wants and needs. Sometimes you have to put your own dreams on hold to parent effectively. I'm not saying give up, everyone should have a dream for the future but when you decide to have a child you have decided to say "I'm not number one anymore all the time." You have a little person who needs you and depends on you. I'm not sure why this is so hard for some divorcees to understand. It seems like common sense. I know its possible because I saw my own parents do it and have been doing it since I was 2. What gets me the most is men or even women (but its mostly men) who believe once you leave the home being a part-time parents OK. ITS NOT! Ask the child, they will tell you first hand they miss you, love you and need you around. Of course things will change. If you're divorced; one parent will see the child less however make an effort. Make every possible effort to be there and present especially when it counts the most. Don't play "fun parent" all the time. You cant let your own guilt for leaving take you away from your number one job..parenting. You still need to discipline and set boundaries.The child will be all the better for it in the end. I don't care if you as 2 adults dont like each other. Keep your mouth shut, play nice and fake it for your own little one. Trust me and take it from someone who knows this will pay off in the end; I'm living proof. I came from that divorced home and I'm normal, healthy, happily married and have 4 parents I love very much.
 The point is divorce is hard. Hard on you, hard on friends, on family and most of all the children. Do whats right by them. Before you act or speak ask yourself "is what I'm about to say or do going to benefit my child?" If the answer is no..shut your mouth.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Keep on Living

Death is never easy. It doesn't matter if the person we lose is 1 or 100 its hard, its sad and Ill never get used to it. I have always said I don't deal well with people close to me dying. People tell me I'm stronger then I think however they aren't with me when I cry on a drive home because I see a spot you and I used to go shopping, or in a when I smell something that reminds me of something you'd cook or in my bed at night when my mind is wondering off and I think of all the things you did just to make me smile. Life seems kind of cruel at times. I mean you get to have years and years with people, some you instantly love some you grow to love. You get to know them inside and out. You start to respect them for their strengths and weaknesses then one day they get taken from you. The only thing you have are memories and pictures. I hate that saying "well at least they are in a better place." its really no comfort; at least not to me. I'm human and by nature humans are selfish. I don't care how nice heaven is I want you here with me. I want to be able to hug you, touch you, laugh, cry and joke with you. Heaven doesn't have a phone, no internet, no way for me to ever hear your voice, your kind words or your wise advice.
The thing I hate the most is attending a viewing. I know people come to pay their last respects but lets face it...viewings are for the living. I highly doubt when you die you float up to heaven and say "oh wait god..I gotta sit and watch my viewing below" They are to busy taking in the sights, sounds and overwhelming feeling of love I believe happens when your soul passes.
  I also understand we cant all live forever and who would want to? Could you imagine how long you'd have to work before one could retire?lol Yet this also is no comfort to me. Its a lose lose...people you love will die, you will be left here to pick up the pieces of your life and move on.
Theres no right answer about how much time is considered "acceptable" to grieve. Every one has their own opinion and usualy its based upon who has died. Apparently you get one amount of time if its a spouce, however its another amount if its a parent and as for aunts, uncles, cousins, well...that should be quick and simple. Thats not me. I feel everything deeply. I cry when I see a child on TV was killed. If Im watching a movie and something happens to an animal well Im done stick a fork in me. Yet everyday people die and everyday the ones left behind keep on living.
You can shed tears that she is gone,
or you can smile because she has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she'll come back,
or you can open your eyes and see all she's left.
Your heart can be empty because you can't see her,
or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember her only that she is gone,
or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind,
be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what she'd want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

LIFE = The sum of all your choices

LIFE...Its full of unexpected surprises; some good some bad but either way they are things that need to be dealt with, corrected or even just acknowledged. I feel like its become the "norm" for a lot of people to talk about their problems in great detail and go on and on about how awful something in their life is yet never come to the realization that if you're not happy, if somethings not working for you...change it. The best part about being a grown up is we all have the power over each decision we make. If we are in a situation that saddens us or makes us angry we all have the power within us to walk away. I'm not saying this light heartily. I'm not implying its always easy or that the road we choose will lead where we imagine it to. What I am saying is life is full of choices. You're never stuck in a situation longer then you allow yourself to be. You are only a victim if you allow yourself to play the "victim" role. Bad things happen to good people everyday. Sometimes you make plans and they don't work out. You know the saying "we are busy making plans while god laughs." Life is one long winding road. All roads have bumps, bridges, cracks and at times floods. However sometimes you come across a road that's perfect. Its clean, paved and easy to cross. Those roads are like a break from the crappy ones. This parallels life. They're will be bumps, there will be days where it seems never ending, one thing after another and nothing goes your way but then you get that one perfect day. Everything you wanted and needed fall's into place. You start to forget about all the negative and realize that all those "hiccups" led you to where you were destined to be. The "bumps" have prepared you for what lies ahead. You look behind you and realize you have weathered the storm, made it through and you have one more notch in your belt. We all need to have these moments. We need to learn how to "prepare for the worst and hope for the best." Stop sitting around waiting for things to be different. Use your own power within to make them different. 
"When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that is in itself a choice."  ~William James
If you have chosen to do nothing thats your decision and you need to live with the outcome. Again you chose it. LIFE is simple...Its a sum of all your choices. Some you made yourself and some where made for you as a child. Either way it our decisions not the conditions of our lives that determine our destiny.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

In the end all we really are is human

LOVE: Noun; An intense feeling of deep affection
TRUST: Verb; to rely upon or place confidence in someone or something

HONESTY: Noun; truthfulness, sincerity, or frankness. 
RESPECT: Verb; to hold in esteem or honor

I read a story about Interracial marriages and how at one time they were forbidden in many states, until the Supreme Court ruled that those laws were unconstitutional by way of "Loving vs.Virginia." The Lovings were an interracial couple who were jailed for being married. They were released but told they couldn't live in Virginia. They sued and won. How ironic their last name was "Loving."
 As I read the story I thought to myself how ridiculous this all seemed to me. States having laws as late as 1959 that a black person and a white person couldn't be married. Although the color of their skin was different they had one thing in common for sure...they were both referred to as a "person."
Its 2011 and we would NEVER think to tell a man and a woman of different race or color they couldn't be married so my question is why is it OK to tell a man and a man or a woman and a woman who are in love and want to be joined in a union as wife and wife or husband and husband that they cant? If you read the definition's of the words above; the very basis for a good marriage, no where will you see these characteristics defined by a gender but rather by the character one holds within.
 I understand there are people who do not agree with this, who think marriage is an institution between man and woman. To those people; I think we all have to believe in something and I'm not here to say what you should and shouldn't believe in. Your morals and judgments are your own however I do not chose to believe the way you do and I wont argue or try to sway you into my beliefs. All I ask is that everyone in the United States should be able to decide what their own beliefs are and act accordingly as long as it doesn't physically hurt or harm anyone in the process. Inst that the very foundation America was founded on? Being free to make ones own choices in the pursuit of life, liberty and happiness?

Love, faith and friendship are the 3 fundamentals to a happy life. I believe you need all 3 to be a complete, balanced person. Those 3 fundamentals must also be present in a marriage if its going to sustain over a long period of time; hopefully ones lifetime. What right is it of anyone's to tell 2 people who feel that way about one another they don't have the legal and human right to stand before god, their friends and family and make it legal/official.
Back in the 50's, 60's and even 70's it was considered taboo to even live with a person of the opposite sex before marriage. Now its considered "normal" and even healthy.The majority of people who are married lived with their spouse ahead of time. There's even a large group of cohabitants who will never get married. They are content living together, sharing a life but don't feel the need to legalize what they feel they already have. Most of us in 2011 wont look at couples who decide to live this way with disdain. We don't preach that they are going against god or going to hell. Its just become the "norm" and that's accepted by most of society this day and age. My hope for the future and for my children's future is this is the way gay marriage will be looked at not to long from now. I hope my children see 2 people who are in love getting married and not define it as a "gay marriage" but by what it really is...2 people who are in love and want to seal that sacred union before god and their loved ones and have it be recognized just as any marriage would be. I hope they read stories about the time 2 gay men or 2 lesbians couldn't legally marry and think "WOW! That's archaic, mean and unjustified" just as I did while reading about blacks and whites not being able to marry. I want my children to grow up in a world where people are equal. Where love is the most important emotion of them all and at the end of the day loving someone and to be loved in return is all we really have and everything that really matters.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Five Lessons About How To Treat People

Five Lessons About How To Treat People
-- Author Unknown

1. First Important Lesson - "Know The Cleaning Lady"

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

"Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello."

I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

2. Second Important Lesson - "Pickup In The Rain"

One night, at 11:30 p.m., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.

A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home.

A special note was attached. It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away. God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."

Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.

3. Third Important Lesson - "Remember Those Who Serve"

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10 year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him. "How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked. "50¢," replied the waitress.

The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it.

"Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired. By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient. "35¢!" she brusquely replied.

The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said. The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left.

When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies. You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.

4. Fourth Important Lesson - "The Obstacles In Our Path"

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand - "Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition."

5. Fifth Important Lesson - "Giving When It Counts"

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare and serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year-old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes, I'll do it if it will save her."

As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheeks. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away?".

Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

For you...because YOU should know how strong you are

Going through a divorce can be such an ordeal.  Some people make the mistake of thinking of it as a mere legal procedure, when it’s really much more of an emotional battle than anything else. 

I want you to know that I understand what you’re going through and that you have my sympathy and support.  If at any time you should need a kind word, a shoulder to cry on or just someone to listen to you, I’ll be here for you; as I have and as I always will be. You and your son are so very special to me and I don’t want you to EVER feel like you’re going through this alone.

It takes bravery, courage and strength to get through a divorce and you are gifted with all three. You have weathered storms, fought losing battles and handled yourself with grace and poise. You get out of bed everyday, take exceptional care of your amazing son, go to work, run errands, cook dinner, clean up, laundry, bath, bed and then get up each day and do it all over again. I understand how hard all of that is and yet day in day out there you are doing it and surviving.

I know happiness is just a word to you right now. I get that you cant see the end of the storm but I promise you it will end and at the end of every storm there is a rainbow, a beautiful sunshine and the promise of a new day. You will have your rainbow. You will experience that sunshine and you will persevere. You are amazing. I LOVE YOU
  • You cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
  • No matter how much you care, some people just don't care back. 
  • It takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it. 
  • It's not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life that counts.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

5 Lessons We Should Stop Teaching Girls

 I DID NOT WRITE THIS...But I read it and LOVED it so I wanted to repost it!

As the mother of a daughter, I want to be deliberate in how I raise her with the hope that she can avoid the hang-ups and pitfalls that I have wrestled with.  While I have learned countless invaluable lessons from the women who raised, nurtured and mentored me, there are a few things that I wish we, as women, could un-learn.

Clear your plate. Whether you’re hungry or not, keep eating until all of the food is gone.  Take one look at me and you will know that I took this one to heart.
New lesson: We don’t want to be wasteful, so don’t put too much on your plate.  Listen to your body.  When you feel full, stop eating.

Be ladylike. How many of us suppress our thoughts and feelings because we don’t want to inconvenience anyone with them?
New lesson: Be considerate, but always speak your mind!

Ambition is not an attractive quality. And thus we limit ourselves.
New lesson: Reach for the stars.  Toot your own horn.  Conquer the world.  And make a ton of money while you’re at it.

It’s not polite to talk about money. Women miss out on hundreds of thousands of dollars over the course of a career because we’re not comfortable negotiating on our own behalf.
New lesson: Be discreet, but know what you’re worth and say so.  Once you earn it, you need to know how to manage it for yourself too.

MY FAVORITE.........

He pushed you down on the playground because he likes you. What?!?
New lesson:
No one gets to touch you without your permission.  Boys who really like you will not be mean to you.  He pushed you down because he’s an asshole.  Tell a grown-up and if it happens again, knock his block off.

Top 10 to a Healthy Strong Marriage

We have been married 3.5 years but together for 8. Through Better and worse, sickness and health,  richer and poorer – we’ve lived through it all.  I don’t think that either one of us are particularly easy to live with, but we’ve smoothed out the bumps over the years and settled into a comfy equilibrium. He could probably write a dissertation on how to stay married from a man’s perspective, but as a wife, here’s what I’ve learned over the past almost decade about keeping our marriage strong and healthy.
  1. Good food and good sex.  It’s a cliché, but if a mans stomachs full and libido taken care of you’re off to an excellent start.
  2. Men need to be needed. This took me a long time to learn. I was raised to believe that I can do for myself.  I don’t need anyone to take care of me; but once I learned to let him be my knight in shining armor, life improved for both of us.
  3. Physical contact.  I read a study once that found a strong correlation between healthy, long-lasting marriages and the number of non-sexual touches in a day. Little things like putting your hand on his knee when he’s driving or when he walks behind you through a doorway and touches the small of your back.  In this study, sex didn’t count because technically you can have sex with someone you don’t even like; but physical affection was shown to strengthen the bond between partners.
  4. Treat each other as you would want to be treated. All of the things that women want, men want too.  Hold your tongue if you have something unkind to say. Be courteous.  Listen when each speaks. Treat the other as your equal.
  5. Have high expectations of each other. Anyone who wants to be treated as an equal needs to step up and be an equal. Therefore, nobody gets a free pass based on their gender. This includes everything from not dating outside the marriage to pitching in with the dishes. Being a man/woman is an excuse for nothing. Men and women are equally capable of good behavior.
  6. Be free and easy with the compliments. Men need and like to hear that they look good just as much as women. Tell him you love him often and tell him why. My rule of thumb is every time I think something nice about him, I make a point of saying it out loud.
  7. Trust, honesty and respect. There is no relationship without these things. Like I have told all the little ones in my life if you have to be sneaky, it means that you’re doing the wrong thing.
  8. Work it out. Your marriage can’t last forever unless you truly believe that it will. My husband and I agreed early on to not even think about divorce, let alone suggest it unless something truly cataclysmic happens, like infidelity, violence, substance abuse, criminal activity, etc. Aside from these deal breakers, hang on tight and get through the hard times.
  9. Make your spouse your priority. My marriage is the foundation for my life and for my future children’s lives. Even though it would be very easy to lose each other in the shuffle of our everyday lives, it benefits everyone to put our relationship first. My parents were big on "Date night." They ALWAYS told us even once you're married and have children you still need that 1 on 1 time alone. If we don't nurture "us" first we will be no good functioning as a team and a family unit as a whole.
  10. Have fun!  Laughter is important.  If you enjoy each others company, you’re more motivated to keep the spark alive.

101 Inspiring Quotes

Hope you find at least a few that speak to you. I know I did......
  1. If you want to be happy, be.   – Leo Tolstoy
  2. The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.   – Mark Twain
  3. Happiness is excitement that has found a settling down place.  But there is always a little corner that keeps flapping around.   – E.L. Konigsburg
  4. Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys.  If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it.   – Fyodor Dostoevsky
  5. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want.   – Margaret Young
  6. This is my “depressed stance”.  When you’re depressed, it makes a lot of difference how you stand.  The worst thing you can do is straighten up and hold your head high because then you’ll start to feel better.  If you’re going to get any joy out of being depressed, you’ve go to stand like this.   – Charlie Brown
  7. Happiness is not a goal; it is a by-product.   – Eleanor Roosevelt
  8. Jumping for joy is good exercise.
  9. One joy scatters a hundred grief’s.   – Chinese proverb
  10. My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it’s on your plate.   – Thornton Wilder
  11. Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.   – Robert Brault
  12. Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.   – Mahatma Gandhi
  13. All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.   – Walt Disney
  14. The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.   – Eleanor Roosevelt
  15. Every now and then go away and have a little relaxation.  To remain constantly at work will diminish your judgment.  Go some distance away, because work will be in perspective and a lack of harmony is more readily seen.   – Leonardo DaVinci
  16. The path involves respect for all small and subtle things.  Learn to recognize the right moment to strike the necessary attitudes.   – Manual of the Warrior of Light
  17. I say “Out” to every negative thought that comes to my mind.  No person, place, or thing has any power over me, for I am the only thinker in my mind.  I create my own reality and everyone in it.   – Louise Hay
  18. The thing that is really hard and really amazing is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.    – Anna Quindlen
  19. I am woman!  I am invincible!  I am pooped!
  20. If you’re going through hell, keep going.   – Winston Churchill
  21. Your problem is you’re too busy holding onto your unworthiness.   – Ram Dass
  22. Trust your gut.   – Barbara Walters
  23. Action is the antidote to despair.   – Joan Baez
  24. She took the leap and built her wings on the way down.
  25. You have brains in your head and feet in your shoes.  You can steer yourself any direction you choose.  You’re on your own and you know what you know.  And you are the one who’ll decide where to go.   – Dr. Seuss
  26. You had the power all along my dear.   – Glinda the Good Witch.
  27. Today is a new day.   – Chicken Little
  28. When you reach for the stars you may not quite get one, but you won’t come up with a handful of mud either.   – Leo Burnett
  29. What the caterpillar calls a tragedy, the Master calls a butterfly.   – Richard Bach
  30. Earth’s crammed with heaven.   – Elizabeth Barrett Browning
  31. Lend yourself to others, but give yourself to yourself.   – Michel de Montaigne
  32. She decided to enjoy more and endure less.
  33. I am unfolding in fulfilling ways.  Only good can come to me.  I now express health, happiness, prosperity, and peace of mind.
  34. Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all.  Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach.  Check your road and the nature of your battle.  The world you desire can be won.  It exists.  It is real.  It is possible.  It is yours.   – Ayn Rand
  35. There is a connection between self-nurturing and self-respect.   – Julia Cameron
  36. Know that joy is rarer, more difficult, and more beautiful than sadness.  Once you make this all-important discovery, you must embrace joy as a moral obligation.   – Andre Gide
  37. Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions all life is an experience.   – Ralph Waldo Emerson
  38. If the future road loom ominous or unpromising, and the road back uninviting, then we need to gather our resolve and, carrying only the necessary baggage, step off that road into another direction.   – Maya Angelou
  39. Breath in experience.   – Muriel Rukeyser
  40. Speak your mind even if your voice shakes.
  41. I rejoice in what I have and I know that fresh new experiences are always ahead.  I greet the new with open arms.  I trust life to be wonderful.   – Louise Hay
  42. Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.   – Mae West
  43. You must do the thing you think you cannot do.   – Eleanor Roosevelt
  44. Sprinkle joy.   – Ralph Waldo Emerson
  45. He is happiest, be he king or peasant, who finds peace in his home.   – Johann von Goethe
  46. She realized that she was missing a great deal by being sensible.
  47. She was kind and loving and patient…with herself.
  48. I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I’ve ended up where I needed to be.   – Douglas Adams
  49. You’ll never be sad if you remember all the good things that have happened to you.  Karolina Grekov
  50. What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger.
  51. Conquering any difficulty always gives on a secret joy, for it means pushing back a boundary line and adding to one’s liberty.   – Henri Frederic Amiel
  52. When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.
  53. People are crying up the rich and variegated plumage of the peacock, and he is himself blushing at the sight of his ugly feet.   – Sa’Di
  54. When the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, it may be that they take better care of it there.   – Cecil Selig
  55. A strong woman understands that the gifts such as logic, decisiveness, and strength are just as feminine as intuition and emotional connection.  She values and uses all of her gifts.   – Nancy Rathburn
  56. Everything you do prepares you for the next thing.   – John Abel
  57. It’s hard to fight an enemy who has outposts in your head.   – Sally Kempton
  58. There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you, and there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.   – Lemony Snicket
  59. A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at her.   – David Brinkley
  60. Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be.   – Dorothy Parker
  61. I begin now, today, to open myself to ever-increasing prosperity.   – Louise Hay
  62. Seize the moment.  Remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert.   – Erma Bombeck
  63. Anything you are good at contributes to happiness.  – Bertrand Russell
  64. The only way to save our dreams is by being generous with ourselves.   – The Pilgramage
  65. Never miss an opportunity to see anything that is beautiful.   – Janet Hobson
  66. There is plenty for everyone, including me.   – Louise Hay
  67. I focus my energy on my true intentions.  I will not be distracted by noise, chatter, or setbacks.  Patience, commitment, grace, and purpose will guide me.   – Louise Hay
  68. A strong woman understands the importance of creating space for personal well-being, spiritual nourishment, and regeneration in order to maintain her authenticity, especially when the universe whacks her with its two-by-four and hands her days when it takes a great deal of courage just to show up.   – Laura Folse
  69. Strength means recognizing that it is impossible to be strong all the time.   – Sally Franser
  70. Just go out there and do what you’ve got to do.   – Martina Navratilova
  71. You can’t be brave if you’ve only had wonderful things happen to you.   – Mary Tyler Moore
  72. I breathe in the fullness and richness of life.  I observe with joy as life abundantly supports me and supplies me with more good than I can imagine.   – Louise Hay
  73. Keep breathing.   – Sophie Tucker
  74. Dwell in possibility.   – Emily Dickinson
  75. Improve your spare moments and they will become the brightest gems in your life.   – Ralph Waldo Emerson
  76. While you are upon the earth, enjoy the good things that are here.   – John Selden
  77. Women really do rule the world.  They just haven’t figured it out yet.  When they do, and they will, we’re all in big trouble.   – Dr. Leon
  78. It’s okay to be fat.  So you’re fat.  Just be fat and shut up about it.   – Roseanne
  79. I accept myself and create peace in my mind and heart.  I now choose to free myself from all destructive fears and doubts.  I am loved and I am safe.   – Louise Hay
  80. Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.   – Will Rogers
  81. She went out on a limb, had it break off behind her, and discovered she could fly.
  82. Go confidently in the direction of your dreams.  Live the life you have imagined.   – Henry David Thoreau
  83. Nothing we learn in this world is ever wasted.   – Eleanor Roosevelt
  84. It doesn’t happen all at once.  You become.  It takes a long time.   – Margery Williams
  85. Nearly every glamorous, wealthy, successful career woman you might envy now started out as some kind of schlep.   – Helen Gurley Brown
  86. The future is here.  It’s just not evenly distributed.   – William Gibson
  87. As soon as people decide to confront a problem, they realize that they are far more capable than they thought they were.   – The Zahir
  88. She discovered that she was the one she’d been waiting for.
  89. Being strong means rejoicing in who you are, complete with imperfections.   – Margaret Woodhouse
  90. Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.   – John Lennon
  91. Happiness is a way of travel, not a destination.   – Roy Goodman
  92. Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box.
  93. The work will wait while you show the child the rainbow but the rainbow won’t wait while you do the work.
  94. One of the greatest weaknesses in most of us is our lack of faith in ourselves.   – L. Tom Perry
  95. Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.
  96. The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.   – Hans Hofmann
  97. Success is a lousy teacher.  It seduces smart people into thinking they can’t lose.   – Bill Gates
  98. Joy is what happens when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are.   – Marianne Williamson
  99. The joy of a spirit is the measure of its power.   – Ninon de l’Enclos
  100. Learning to live in the present moment is part of the path to joy.   – Sarah Ban Breathnach
  101. There is only one success – to be able to spend your life in your own way.   – Christopher Morley